just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
