You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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