Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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