I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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