I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I met the friendliest cop last night
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
