No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Randomize
