My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
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