I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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