Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize