Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
