Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
