i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
