I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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