Its about making memories worth repressing
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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