Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
