i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
