Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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