I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
