when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
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