too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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