I got chris browned last night
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
