i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
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