"it" just moved
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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