I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
