David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
