lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Randomize