do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
