For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Everclear isn't food dammit
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
