'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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