Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Randomize
