ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
