you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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