Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
