dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
