before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
