i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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