capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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