I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
