Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
vagina is talking i cant
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
