Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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