it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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