she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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