i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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