Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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