this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize