I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
