She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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