if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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