Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
