And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
