Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
